BC1: Day Seven

So... I was a little quiet because my brother is definitely in the room next door. And we have thin walls. And it's embarrassing to admit this stuff (though he already knows it haha). But yeah. Oh! And at 0:35, I meant to say vlogger, not blogger. Alright, I'm off to do some late night chores.

Until tomorrow... ♥

Change of Seasons/Good Life

Ketchup

Okay. So I looked at my calender earlier and I realized it was Tuesday. Whoo! I survived two days of school (this week)!
So today was ridiculously cold. I was just talking to my mom about how this morning it wasn't cold, but I nearly froze to death on my way home... Then I remembered that she gave me a ride to school this morning LOL. But seriously. My face was numb, I couldn't feel my toes, and my fingers felt like they were going to fall off even though I had gloves on. And this was all in Roslindale Square as I was waiting for the bus. Ridiculous. Yesterday was like 50 degrees! I wore a skirt! Yet when I was walking over to Stop and Shop a couple hours ago (I was warm everywhere except my head, stupid wind >_>) it was snowing. Seriously? Snow? I mean, I know it's winter and everything but I was sort of hoping the snow would be put off until the week starting Christmas break or something lol. Winter's my favorite season, but I don't like the cold. The bitter, biting winter cold. It makes me shiver. Haha pun.
Anywhom, I made my Christmas list (for other people) just the other day. So sad haha. I mean, I love it, all my ideas are awesome (as usual lol jk) but it's so last minute! And I have barely any money to work with! I feel bad because everyone else says how they got me the perfect gift or something, but I have nothing for them (yet anyway). So for half of the people on my list, I hope they accept and enjoy my baked goods. <:\ This is exactly what happened last year. I gave people late gifts. I ended up giving people gifts up until my birthday, when I should've been recieving gifts lol. I even used some of my birthday money to get those last few gifts. How bad is that? lol
But hey, in the end they're happy (I hope) and I'm happy so it works out. I just need to work on saving my money. And getting a job so I can make a steady income. Sigh. I really hope people like their gifts this year. I have like the best things planned. It'll just take time -_-
And my shindig. I've been debating with myself about whether I should have it or not, but I think I will. I should anyway. Even if like nobody RSVP'd the event, I know at least a few people will come. And just those few people will make it awesome. Even if we are just sitting around watching movies and baking :\ (My house is so lame. There's nothing to do! lol)
I don't think I would've wanted certain people to come anyway...

So recently I've been having these thoughts. And I'm not sure if they're correct or not, but that's what it feels like... I feel like "the other woman". Haha yes, it sounds funny but I'm serious. Maybe I keep doing things with him because subconsciously I'm still trying to get him, but I don't want that. He has a girlfriend. I don't wanna be a homewrecker! lol
Let's hope that I'm just the "really good woman friend" and nothing more.

Hey! Malcolm's visting for the holidays! :D
He's coming this Sunday, I can't wait. He and Mr. T and me are gonna go last minute Christmas shopping haha. Funn!
Oh and I have to preform in the Winter Concert Thursday for Chorus. Yay. I can't wait. (Can you feel the sarcasm?) I mean, last week if you had asked me I would've said that I'm excited for the concert, but after today, not anymore. I told Mr. Wurman that I wasn't feeling well and that I was gonna go home after school, but he said that I had to go to dress rehearsal -_-
So eventhough I was sick, I went. And I didn't even sing, I sat in the "audience". And at the end right before I was gonna leave, he snatched the permission slip from me. That pissed me off. I know it's his first year and everything, but he's just way too antsy about this. I understand that some of the people in Chorus won't stop talking, but there's no reason for him to take out his frustrations on me. The same thing happened with Spirit Day. This is just one of the differences between BPS and suburban schools (Lexington). When I was in Chorus, it was NICE. We got shirts, we performed at a retirement home, we sounded awesome. Though the music teacher was sort of a slut, she was fun and knew what she was doing. I'm not saying that Mr. Wurman doesn't know what he's doing, I just feel like he's overwhelmed with all these kids. Because back in Lexington there was like maybe 20 people in our group. I don't know. He just needs to take a chill pill.

Alright. I still have lots of work to do so I'll write you later blogettes.
Night!

BC1: Day Six

Something you hope you never have to do.

I hope I never have to... fight anyone. Like for real. I say that I'm gonna beat people up all the time, but I don't actually mean it. When I say that it either means that the person hurt me or hurt someone that I love... or that I love them, but they did something stupid. Yup. Those are really the only reasons I'd say that I'll beat someone up. But I'm a lover, not a fighter (a hopeless lover at that lol). I don't like violence. Like that fight I witnessed between Bianca and U... (I don't know her nameee >.<) on Friday. That scared the shit outta me. I was just walking up the stairs going to my locker when I noticed people arguing and then *BAM* punches getting thrown.
I'm an advocate for peace. (Well, I don't talk about it, but I try to keep the peace through my actions.) However though I've taken self defense classes and have some muscles from volleyball, I doubt I'd be able to defend myself well in a real fight.
Still, I think fighting one another is a little barbaric. I mean, it doesn't make sense. Use your words. Walk away. Again, if we all were a bit more accepting and loving, we wouldn't have to worry about these problems.

Oh, you know what? I also hope that I never have to make one of those life-threatening decisions like in Saw. And I hope I never have to hurt someone else intentionally (I guess that goes along with the fighting thing). And I hope I never have to witness a murder or a rape or a robbery or something like that. That'd be horrid. Average people like to turn their heads on the basest habits of evil men, but they exist. It's out there and it happens everyday.

Whoo. Okay, I'm done.
Until tomorrow... ♥

BC1: Day Five

Something you hope to do in your life.

You know, I would love to complete my list of things before I pass away, but let's be a bit more realistic..
Besides, that list is filled with mostly materialistic things. At the end of the day, at the end of my life, I would like to have accomplished two things. I hope to make someone cry tears of joy and I hope to be remembered long past my time for the great things I've done. That's all. Simple as that. Haha.
Who knows, maybe I've already done the first one (though I'd love to see it for myself). As for the second one, well, the sole thing humans need to survive is love (because with love, anything is possible). Everyone needs it, everyone wants it. It's nice to feel loved, but I guess I'm a bit selfish for wanting to be loved past my time haha. I'd love to know that there will be people (whether it be my descendants or my friends' descendants) who tell stories about me, people who say "Oh Christina? She changed my life." Before I die I want to know that I made an impact on someone's life, that I was a good friend, that I was there for people. So can you blame me for wanting to be more than a floating thought in people's distant memories? Something tangible would be nice (maybe a statue? lol jk), even if I never get the chance to see it.


Haha. Towards the end I was joking, but for the most part I was being serious. Those are my hopes for my life. I just want to make it meaningful. Don't we all?

Until tomorrow.
♥


P.S. Those days when I skipped, I was busy. Especially Saturday night. Yes, I went to the Winter Blackout. It was... nice :)
The whole night was cool. And I love how it ended... *blush*

BC1: Day Four

Something you have to forgive someone for.

My sister. I have to forgive her for... (I can't say that she wasn't a good sister because really, what is a good sister? And I doubt I could be any better) I have to forgive her for not showing that she loved and cared for me more. That, plus her personality, is the reason why our relationship sucks if it even exists. We're 5 years apart. And I get that while I still wanted to play with Barbies she was a teenager, growing fast and moving on to the next hobby that interested her. I get that reason why she didn't play with me, but come on. Even past those childhood years she barely tried. How can you build a relationship based on a history full of nothings?
And her personality sucks. People say we look exactly alike, but we couldn't be any more different. Granted, we have some similarities (things I probably acquired from her, like my short temper), but as a whole I'm calm and collected and she's wild and unruly. Let's say for instance she just dropped by the house for some food. What would aggravate the hell out of me would be if she complains about the food that my mom made. She'd be like "ugh, what is this?", get some food, complain while eating it, then throw away half of her plate. Like wtf? Be grateful you're getting food at all! And other little things that annoy me. Sometimes she'd tap my shoulder (so that I'd turn around and she'd act like she didn't do anything) or call my name repeatedly, which maybe is her way of trying to reach out to me, but it only makes me mad. I can't stand it. She threw my baking stuff in the trash once because she was complaining that I'd left it out too long. She warned me that she would, but I didn't take her seriously. I mean, who does that? She didn't pay for that stuff, she has NO RIGHT to touch it not to mention throw it away. She can be such a bitch. One minute she'd be joking and all happy and the next she'd be centimeters from ripping your head off. And she's constantly "borrowing" stuff without asking. Considering that she lives in Salem and doesn't give it back no matter how many times you ask her for it or remind her to bring it with her, that's very selfish. Sigh. We have no relationship. We may be blood, she may be my sister, but I don't think I could ever feel close to her.
So yes, I feel like I have to forgive her for not spending time with me when I was younger because she was a teenager handling her own problems and living her own life. And I hope one day we will be able to patch up our relationship, but it may be too late for that.
It's sad knowing that you have a blood sibling, but never being able to say that you love them.


Anywhom, that was my sob story.
Cya!