Thursday, July 15, 2010


This was something else I wrote in a note on my phone. It needs no explaining. I saved it because I thought that I should remember it. I don't know....

April 14, 2010
5:09 PM

I feel like crawling to my room and just hiding away from the world... but I've learned that you have to be brave sometimes and that some things are bigger than you. You gotta think about others and be there for those in times of need. I'm glad to do that if it's for my friends, those I love dear.

Random Kid

This was something I had in a note on my phone a while ago. Hahah. I just thought it should be in here :)
I was at the YMCA on one of the weight machines...

June 21, 2010
3:07 PM

Okay some RANDOM ass kid first waved at me as he was walking by I had no idea who he was so I didn't wave back (maybe he was waving at someone through the glass behind me?)
I let it go. But as he was walking out of the little office the walked in, he came over to me and FIST BUMPED. He said hi and I was like "...hi?" Then he left. Who the braided mo-fo was, I have no idea but I don't think I want to see him again...

LMAO. Good stuff. I have a feeling I met him at this Y Teen Leaders outing I went on. We went to a Red Sox game. Maybe he was the kid I was sitting next to? LOL. Oh well, I'll never know.


I do what I must to survive,
to live.
I guard my heart with an iron cast
because maybe, just maybe
absence of emotion
is better.
This void permits no thrills
or runs of sudden, ecstatic happiness.
But there aren't any
heart-wrenching depressions either.
There are no letdowns.
For if I have nothing to hope for
I won't be disappointed
not to get it.
So when you see me next
I will be ready.
I will be armored.
Emotions will be contained.
They have to be for me to move on.
Maybe, just maybe
this void will grant me peace.
the sad part is:
fembots have feelings too.
So when everyone disappears
and I'm left to my own devices,
that's when the metal melts away
and the core is exposed.
Emotions are let loose
and the fembot cries.

What no one ever told ya, was you can cry when you get older...

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Sooo. This is Summer.

Hello all! Sorry I haven't been updating. I'm lazy. I could lie and say that I've been very busy for the past couple of weeks, but I won't. There have been times when I started writing a little something to post on here or even in a note on my iPod, but I never seem to finish them. I just have this thing where if I'm gonna post something, it has to be complete and good. But I guess I should get over that because to write a good blog it takes me like an hour or so. So from now on I'll try to one, keep it simple, two, shorten it, and three, post even if I don't finish. Are you happy?
Haha. I'm sorry. I know that you all love to see the monkeys on my page (but hate that the first words you see are F U, lol). I promise to post at least once a week, I'll try to at least (that would be number four in that little list above).
For those of you who are new followers, I must tell you that even though you are all friends, I'm still private about my blogs. I try to use nicknames when I talk about people. Sooner or later you'll figure out who they are.
On that note, Sushi said that she doesn't like blogging lol. I doubt she's going to be updating any time soon (if at all!). Now with that being said, on with the blog!

Hiiii! I'm back :D
Hmmm. But when I think of interesting stuff to write about nothing comes to mind. Unfortunately, I haven't been doing much lately. For the past... let's say two weeks, I've mostly stayed in my house watching TV and movies. It's not fun -- anymore.
Phew. Now I'm getting tired. But I have to give updates so I guess I'll just highlight stuff that happened previously and then tell you what happened today.
*runs upstairs to get the big calender on her desk*
Muahahaha! I knew there was a good reason why I've been writing down what I do everyday. By the start of each school year I usually find myself answering "Not much" when people ask what I did during the summer. However, I figured that if I wrote everything down, I would see exactly what I did and when. And now I can use it for my blogs! Hahaha.
Anywho, let's see... During the last week of school I went to Dedham mall with Sushi where we saw Jenn (they hit it off great! lol). I had a "date" with Vicky and Tingtong (and Tony) which was funnn! It was my first time eating froyo at Red Mango (yummy, but expensive). I got a smoothie and went to Gally with Sushi (more malling hehe). Again, the smoothie was yummy but expensive. I had an amazing day with Rose, Derek, and Sushi. We went to Cheers and ended up just wandering around having the BEST time :D I can't wait to do it again with karaoke, though I now know that Rose is a horrible event planner. I volunteered at the Red Cross Food Pantry with people from the Y. That was a great experience too (especially with the yummy chocolates they gave us afterwards). I went to Blue Star with my dad for brunch (more yummy food). Then I went to JFK beach twice in a row with Vicky and Tingtong and others lol. My dad wasn't too happy about that. But I still had fun... the first day that is. The second day was sorta kinda crappy. I cried *sigh*
JULY. I made delicious strawberry banana muffins early in the morning then went to Gally with Vicky (had to wait a VERY long time >_>). I went to the movies with my mom and dad and saw Toy Story 3 and Avatar: The Last Airbender. Avatar could've been better, but Toy Story was AWESOME! I'm a little sad it's over. I spent the Fourth (my favorite holiday!) with my bestie. We had a little cookout. I wish things were different between us... Then I went to see the fireworks with the Gang.
Yeaaaaa.... after that (it's like I said, for the past two weeks -- since last Monday) thigns have been pretty boring. I used to ride my bike, but I can't anymore because it broke -__-"
And I've only gone to the Y once in the past week or so. I have no money to take the T. I'm not getting allowance for the meantime. How am I supposed to keep my membership? Better yet, how am I supposed to stay in shape for volleyball??! I'm sitting around this house doing nothing productive all day. I mean, if I can't go anywhere I could at least be reading summer reading books or finishing my application for that job or writing my college essays or reading the driver's manual or best of all, I could be making my list of colleges and visiting schools. Ugh procrastination and laziness makes one hell of a curse.
I always say that I'm going to do great things, but it never happens. I disappoint myself sometims, smh. I will change. It's inevitable, I am human. Anywho, where was I? Right, what I did today.
Today I woke up at 10:30. (I've been setting my alarm clock to around that time in the morning because waking up at noon doesn't feel good anymore. Unfortunately, I still end up sleeping at like 2 in the morning. Well, 8 hours of sleep is good enough I guess. I just have to train my body.) I took a shower, made some eggs, watched Phineas and Ferb (my favorite show!), then went on my laptop to update the songs in my library. Later around 6 I went to Sushi's place and had a little picnic and played video games haha. That was fun. Then I came back here, took a shower and started blogging :)
I wonder what I'll do tomorrow. I think I'll read a bit. There are still a bunch of things to do this summer (even if I didn't get to do the other things on my list): karaoke, Pour House, the beach, Sushi's birthday, movie/pizza party, sleepover. Plus all those other serious things of course. Right now, I'm painting my nails while listening to the CDs Sushi let me borrow. She's right, B.O.B.'s CD is nice :)
So um, I'm gonna post up the last poem I finished and them maybe those other half finished posts Inever got around to haha. Alright, nighty night!
Sorry this is so long, I promise the next update won't be so long :\

Bye blogging losers! :D