Hello dear readers. It's been a while. A very long while haha. I meant to blog last weekend, but I got lazy. Oh well hehe.
So today was Spirit Day. Everything was so nerve-racking. (Thank goodness it's the last one!) This morning was CRAPPPP. Last night after Cao's party I came home and uploaded pics for a god 2/3 hours. I fell asleep at like 1:30. Then I had to wake, get ready, get all my stuff packed and good to go for my performance, and run out the door (because they said that if you come late to school, they won't let you in). But I was running late and I missed my bus. So I had to ask my mom for a ride and she got mad and was yelling at me. It was just really loud -_-
Especially since we were arguing the night before too. We haven't really been getting along that well. But anywho, I ran for volleyball and sang for Chorus and danced with Bobby (*bleck*). It was ridiculous. But it was fun. It was definitely a lot more fun than rehearsals though. I got a major headache during that -- actually all that afternoon. I don't know, I was just pissed. There was way too much going on.
But after school got out I went with Vicky to her house because we were gonna go ice skating. Aside from the spring rolls that gave me an itchy throat (allergic reaction; this happened the last time I had spring rolls too! I think it's the hoisin sauce! It has sesame seeds in it. I'm allergic to sesame seeds. Or it could just be a psychological thing like because I saw shrimp I got paranoid and my body started reacting to it... I don't know, but I feel bad. Vicky's so sweet. Lol I wish I wasn't allergic to so many things...)
So aside from the spring rolls, I had fun with Vicky :)
Then we went to Frog Pond. I got out the car and like couldn't stop shivering. I saw Jannie and Christine... and then I saw Qui. And I asked him what he was doing there. And he said he came to see his girlfriend skate.
And after a few minutes of waiting in line I didn't want to be there anymore. So I left. I felt really bad for leaving, but I couldn't handle it. I hope I get another chance to skate with Vicky again. This is the second time we meant to (skate together) but never did :(
And I walked through the Commons in the cold. The trees were really pretty blowing in the wind. And I sat in the corner on the train. And I cried. Thank goodness for hoodies. Then I got to Forest Hills and waiting in the freezing cold for my bus. And right before I got on this girl asked me if I played volleyball and I nodded my head and showed her the front of my hoodie. Then I fell asleep on the bus and almost missed my bus stop. And I went to my room and crawled under the covers and slept. And slept. And my mom tried to wake me up. She was trying to massage my back from when I fell down the stairs last week... don't ask me why. Maybe I have some bruise on my back that I don't know about. But in my half-sleep state I told her to stop and rolled over and fell back asleep. Then I woke up at midnight. And I just lay on my bed for a while wishing I could fall back asleep so I wouldn't have to think. And after eating a bowl of cereal I'm wide awake. So I'm watching movies online. And yea. This is probably gonna be the worst Thanksgiving I've had... ever.
This (situation) is so stupid. I should've known better. And if only he weren't so... friendly. I sort of knew this would happen, but I didn't think it'd be this soon. I guess this just means I have more time to heal and get over it...
We were supposed to go to the mall on Friday, but if he doesn't say anything about it I don't think I'm gonna go. It sucks because he's like my closest guy friend. And now I'm in the perrrrr-dicament.
Sometimes I feel like I'll never find the right guy lol. Or maybe I'm looking in all the wrong places. Volleyball and guys should stay separate. Forever. It's easier that way. For me anyway.
Or maybe I should just go lesbian lol.
Sigh, what am I gonna do? For the next couple hours, I mean. I already slept for 8+ hours. The more I stay up, the more I have time to think about things. And I don't want to think about things. Can't I just forget? Forget it all? Please? :'(
Happy Turkey Day guys. Have fun. Be thankful.
I guess I'm thankful for friends -- OTHER friends. But I don't even think I want to talk to them about it right now. I'll just lie to myself and deny it ever happened.
Anywho, blog ya later. I'm sure I'll blog more this weekend.