Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Ehh.

I'm still sad. And it's really starting to show now. People keep asking me "are you okay?" and I just answer "yeah" or "I'm fine", but I'm getting tired of lying. I'm in serious need of a pick-me-up. Someone needs to take me out and help me be happy again... Or I need to stop moping around and get over whatever it is that's bothering me. Sigh. Junior year absolutely sucks.
Tomorrow is my AP English test, yay! I barely learned a thing from that class. Except probably not to take AP classes. (Stupid me, I signed up for AP Biology...) So wish me good luck because I know I'll need it. Sighhhhh.

So today. Before going to lunch I stopped by the bathroom to take out my retainer and guess what I see? I walk in and I see at least 6 girls just sitting there. One girl pulled in a chair from the cafeteria, another two are sitting next to the windows, and two others are sitting with their feet ON THE SINKS. Like WHAT THE FUCK?! There was this one girl who had just come out of the bathroom and was washing her hands so I had to wait to use the ONLY OTHER SINK. Stupid little bitches. They must have no lives. One chick was doing her homework. I mean, if you're gonna skip class don't just hang out in the bathroom, go leave school or something. UGH! The underclassmen piss me off SO MUCH. The things they do... >_<"
And you know how when you walk in a bathroom full of a group of gossiping girls they all stop talking? That's what happened. I mean, it's embarrassing enough that I had to take out and wash my retainer in front of them. But I could feel their stares. AGH! Sometimes I really hate how girls act. Punk-ass bitches. I was so mad (obviously I still am). I wanted to start a fight, but clearly that wasn't the best option lol. I'll just let them run the school into the ground I guess. I don't know. Smh, what that school's becoming...

And afterschool I learned that the guys had a home game against Madison. So I stayed for a bit, but after a while I felt all sad and depressed again. Bobby and I were gonna pass, but Linh sauntered in and they talked for like 20 minutes. Next thing I know Jenny came in and he started passing with her... and Hung joined in... and Vicky. So disappointed and disheartened by the rush of much prettier girls that flowed in the gym, I walked around for a bit. I ended up at the top of the bleachers on the other side of the gym just listening to music. Ironically, just the people I wanted to avoid, Hung, Jenny and them were passing in front of the very same bleachers. Great. Luckily Vthong was there to keep me company for a while. I lay down for most of the game and I left at around 3:30 to catch the 14.
But that referee lady stopped me before leaving. She reminded me again that I was very beautiful (a great way to cheer up someone's day -- I think I'm going to start doing that, giving people compliments daily; as long as it brightens someone's day, I'm glad to do it). Then she told me that she was gonna get one of the coaches to contact me. But I told her I didn't know how I was gonna get all the way to Foxboro for all the games. She she ended it just saying to forget it. She said that I should focus on my studies. I should've told her that I did really want to do it, just that transportation was just going to be a problem... but Hung came over and I already wasn't in a good mood so I just left. And I opened the door to find the 14 drive by. So I had to take the train home. I thought about going back in to take the train home with Qui, but I didn't know if he was going anywhere afterwards and I really didn't want to see everybody's faces again so I just went home.

Is it weird that I forget all my problems at home (as long as my dad doesn't start any argumentative conversations with me)? I ate some food and watched Law and Order: SVU. I felt almost happy. Hmmm. Maybe it's just the whole school environment....

Anywho, I have to go study and do other work. A lot of stuff planned for the next two days... And my mom. She scared me this morning. Her arthritis is getting worse... Ttyl.
Xtina<3

P.S. I didn't talk to Cwong at the game... and she didn't talk to me. That makes me REALLY sad :'(
What happened?

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