Failure

I was having stomach aches earlier so I took a nap. Then in the past hour or so I woke up, ate some food, wrote a poem, and came up with an impressive idea. After eating I found myself staring at my book practically falling asleep. That's when I realized that I could not come up with a 5 page essay about a book I barely remember in less than 8 hours. Right now, for me it just seems impossible. I'm emotionally unstable, sleep-deprived, and completely unfocused. So I came up with this plan to type an essay instead on why I can't do the essay and turn it in on turnitin.com. It was genius, the best (and worst) idea I've come up with in a while. To lengthen it I would've added information on what I did this weekend, described my experiences with RIT and Framingham, discussed my worries about college, told about the long days and even longer nights of the past few days, mentioned my specific difficulty with the book, and referenced to how I honestly don't feel like I'm able to write anything. I even came up with a thesis statement. Of course I would've been completely honest throughout the entire thing. Yes, I would be listing excuses but they're all major concerns and complications to me. I would've mentioned also that yes, I should have started all this earlier to save me time and trouble, but that I've worked too hard my throughout my high school career for it all to be taken away by not completing one English assignment, that I would make it up as soon as possible knowing that the final is due next Monday. It would have been a very interesting (or disappointing) essay for Ms. Williams to read. But just as I was about to start it, I logged onto turnitin and saw that late assignments were accepted. So I was saved. Or at least given some time to seriously buckle down. And now that that's out of the way (more like held off for a bit) I'm going to go upstairs and fall asleep and get ready to work my ass off tomorrow. I won't go down without a fight, that's for sure. Maybe I'll post that poem I wrote later. For now, I'm gonna hit the hay and catch some Z's. Night.

And yet, I still feel like a failure...