So I've come to realize that I'm HORRIBLE at flirting. It doesn't matter what anybody says. I am, period.
I was sitting in the lounge with a group of friends and, lo-and-behold, Jay comes by. Of course he sits down. He tells us that he lost his game and that he's dead. His neck was hurting so he asked me to fix it and lays his head on the top of the couch next to me. I don't know how to give massages, I'm not even gonna try. Especially not on some guy I sorta kinda like (who may or may not sorta kinda like me too) in front of a group of people I know. I just.. can't. So I poked his neck for a bit, that's it. I didn't know what to do. Looking back on it, I get the feeling he expected me to get more physical and actually give him a massage.. or at least attempt to. But I'm shy. I couldn't do it.
Sigh, my shyness will get me NOWHERE with a guy. And don't even get me started on flirting. That word doesn't exist in my vocabulary.
Oh, but wait. Just as I finish this post Jay came around again. And I told him to join me while I finish homework. He is. So let's see how this ends... Me in my robe and retainer and him in his revealing black tee. Sigh, my life..